Holiday Blues

Just been on holiday to Ibiza and back at work. Bummer. Ibiza was amazing, not really for the parties, although they were good…but mainly for the energy of the place. I know that sounds all hippy but I don’t care. Maybe I want to be a hippy…maybe I want to be one of those guys that wanders happily up and down the beach all day, selling their gorgeous colourful clothes they bought in India for about 50p. Why not? Trust me, it would be better than putting my corset back on after a week of eating fried calamari and chipirones everyday. And on the subject of energy, the club I work in has to have one of the worst kinds. The minute you walk in through the back entrance you are greeted by the disdainful glare of the back door security guard, a man who doesn’t understand the concept of bad mood as he has spent his entire life in one and who looks at you as though you have just thrown his mother out of her home and left her living on the streets in a pile of her own shit. As you can see, I love this guy…and he loves me. He grabs your bag off you and thrusts his hand into it, feeling and groping around, pulling out items and laughing scornfully at them or commenting derogatively on them. Then barks at you to take your coat off so he can frisk it. Oh God, I love this guy. If you manage to survive this interaction with your positive energy intact, you then open the door to the club and commence down the stairs, where another hateful security guard waits to make a stupid perverted comment about whatever stupid perverted subject is currently occupying his stupid and perverted mind. Obviously I am always late, so I am then routinely shouted at by the floor manager, who is a prime example of both napoleon syndrome and power issues in modern man and who talks to me like my most hated teachers talked to me in high school. Looking around you see the philipino bus boys with dread and weariness in their faces, all set in their ways from 20 years of work in this place, who all say the same thing every day…’Ooooooh dear….Nothing anymore…NOTHING!...no business…no money….Ooooooh dear…’ Everyone moans about there not being any money anymore, even though everyone is making enough. Everyone watches everyone else and how much they are making and bitches and comments and scowls. Everyone is out for themselves and steal other peoples customers, tables and tips. I say everyone, but that’s not true….there are clearly some great people there but the general energy of the place is one of greed, anger, resentment, boredom, vanity and facades. I need to get out of there. Or change my attitude. I’m sure there is a more positive way of looking at it. I’m going to a Buddhist and meditation class tonight…7-8.30pm just round the corner from my house. I’m a bit apprehensive about what kind of people will be there…I have grown up to be very judgmental of the kind of people that attend Buddhist and meditation classes unfortunately. However, I am now one of those people so I am going to embrace it and hope that it gives me some positive energy, preferably enough to get through work happily tonight, and maybe even spread some through the club along the way….Lord knows, it needs it.